What RSVP means on a wedding card.

RSVP is a French abbreviation meaning répondez s'il vous plaît, which translates as "please respond". The phrase entered Anglophone etiquette in the eighteenth century when French was the lingua franca of diplomacy and correspondence, and it stuck as the standard request for a reply to an invitation. You will see it on wedding invitations, party invitations, dinner invitations, and formal event cards.

When a wedding card says "RSVP by 14 May", it is asking you to confirm whether you will attend by that date. A reply is not optional; silence is considered discourteous. The French original has a softer politeness ("if you would please") that the English usage preserves.

Three common RSVP formats. Respond in whichever form the couple asks for:

Online RSVP (most common today)

The invitation includes a wedding-website URL. Click the RSVP link, enter your name, select attending or not attending, answer any follow-up questions (plus-one, dietary requirements, which events you will attend). Submit. Done.

Reply card (traditional)

A pre-stamped reply card is included in the envelope. Fill in your name, tick attending or not attending, drop it in the post. Reply cards typically have a deadline printed; respect it.

Email or phone (modern-casual)

The invitation gives an email address or phone number. Reply with your name, attendance status, and any useful details (dietary, plus-one). Keep it short; this is not the place for a long message.

Most wedding invitations include a specific RSVP deadline, typically eight to ten weeks before the wedding date. If no deadline is stated, respond within two to three weeks of receiving the invitation.

For destination weddings, RSVP windows run longer (three to four weeks from the invitation) but the total runway is also longer; invitations go out eight months ahead, RSVPs close three months before the wedding.

• Name on the invitation (one guest or a couple)
• Attendance status (attending / not attending)
• Plus-one status (if applicable)
• Dietary requirements (vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, allergies)
• Meal preference (if a choice is offered)
• For destination weddings: which events you will attend (welcome dinner, wedding, farewell brunch)
• Any song requests or notes to the couple (optional)

A destination-wedding RSVP asks more than a local one because the couple is coordinating travel, accommodations, and a multi-day programme. Respond sooner rather than later — typically within two weeks of receiving the invitation — because the couple needs to reserve hotel rooms and confirm vendor numbers well ahead of the date.

For the full destination-wedding RSVP guide, including when to RSVP, how to decline gracefully, and what to do after saying yes, see our destination-wedding RSVP guide.